A Great Article by my SIS

Thanks, sis, for including this link in your comments to your blog from last year. It is an excellent article and awesome advise. For all others who read my blog, this is a MUSt read: http://homeschoolblogger.com/quietcajun/61928

The Way to a Happy New Year (not written by me)

The Way to a Happy New Year
To leave the old with a burst of song;
To recall the right and forgive the wrong;
To forget the things that bind you fast
To the vain regrets of the year that’s past;
To have the strength to let go your hold
Of the not worthwhile of the days grown old;
To dare go forth with a purpose true,
To the unknown task of the year that’s new;
To help your brother along the road,
To do his work and lift his load;
To add your gift to the world’s good cheer,
Is to have and to give a Happy New Year.
- Author Unknown

Ecclesiastes 3

Ecclesiastes 3:4, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance.
Right now I am in the midst of mourning & weeping. I know most people get impatient w/ sorrow and except you to be fine a day or 2 later, especially when they can’t understand how precious a cat can be. Although I feel awfully self-centered for not using my blog for the purpose I started it, to encourage others, I need to wallow for a while. So I probably won’t write as much right now, and when I do, I am very certain it will have a more-than-usual cynical edge to it. Although my heart is broken, and I fight tears all day and night, my walk w/ God remains the same. Unless cats go to heaven, I will miss Cosette forever, but my heart will eventually heal. In the meantime, I will do my best to reflect the love of God when I do write, and not dwell on me.

New Year’s Resolution Article

I don’t actually make New Year’s resolutions, but this is a good article with some good advice on how to improve your Christian walk: http://vsb.gospelcom.net/Newyearsres.html It's a little long, so I just skimmed it, but I still think it's worth at least a qiuck glance!

The Pursuit of Happyness

I saw the new movie “The Pursuit of Happyness” (purposely spelled wrong), on Friday w/ my friend Cheryl. The previews do not do the movie justice. It is such a moving and inspirational story. I saw both Will Smith & his son Jaden on Oprah a couple of weeks ago, so I already knew what was going to happen, but I still got choked up twice and actually had tears at the end. The title has to do with the Declaration of Independence phrase, and the main character, Christopher Gardner, takes it a step farther by saying that we must literally pursue happiness in order to achieve our dreams. We must not give up no matter what anyone else says or believes.
I have felt this way for a long time as well. Although God is very great and good, He does not hand us our dreams on a silver platter (at least not in my case, for some this is the case). We have to be proactive and work for what we want For me the hardest part is that I have worked so hard for many of my dreams only to fall short and to not have achieved a single one. Yet, after seeing this movie, I feel much more inspired. If a man as down and out as Christopher could obtain his goal with so little, then what is my malfunction? I need to reevaluate my life as well as my strategies. Of course, no matter how hard we try, we may continue to fail if what we want is not in God’s will. So hopefully my goals line up with His!
P.S. I also saw the movie “The Nativity Story” this weekend. It was very beautifully made. I thought the actress who portrayed Mary lacked personality (not that she was a bad actress, I just would have liked to have seen more emotion, especially when she was visited by Gabriel), but Joseph came across as a man you would expect to be the human father to Christ. He was generous, gracious, humble, and tender-hearted.

The Psychology of Christmas Cards

One of my favorite parts of Christmas is getting cards. You learn a lot about a person by the card they give and what the season means to them. Even if the person isn’t so-called “religious,” but their card has a “religious” message, to me this means they at least acknowledge that Christ came to this earth as a baby and may even go to church once and a while, or at least on Christmas. Other cards show that they simply see Christmas as a time to exchange gifts if their card has a present on it and inside whishes that you get all you want. Or maybe it’s just a cute picture of a baby or animal. Christmas to them is warm and fuzzy. What if there is a snow scene of some kind? Then I think it’s about having fun in the snow. What about those w/ no Christmas picture at all, but maybe a symbol of peace such as a dove? Then they see this time of year as a great opportunity for spreading peace and good will to all.
I am partly being sarcastic here by over-analyzing the psychology of Christmas cards. But it really does bring to mind what kind of Christmas card we want to be. I hope my message says I am not materialistic, I do love the beauty of snow (just don’t like to drive in it), I want peace for all, and I also believe Jesus is the main focus of the reason for the season (that’s obvious by now!).
P.S. Just a funny note on my overly logical mind. Sidney and I always joke that it seems we are more logical than most, so we decided we are the Spocks and others are the tribbles. (That will only be funny if you watched the original Star Trek show!)
I’m sure I won’t blog again until at least the 26th, so Merry Christmas, may your heart be merry and light (even when it feels sad and heavy)! May your days be Mary and Bernal (spelling?), and may all your Christmases be eternal! – Remember that, s..i.s?

The Reason for the Season

I had the privilege of hearing my dad preach Saturday evening. It was at a Romanian Assembly of God church. It was interesting b/c the entire service was in Romanian. So my dad and I each had someone offer to sit by us and interpret. And when my dad spoke, the pastor translated for him. It made me think that Christians are all translators of the gospel for those who do not understand. We better make sure we get the interpretation correct!
My dad’s message was excellent (he is the best preacher). He interspersed his message with reading Matthew & Luke in telling of the birth of Christ. He pointed out all the ways this story was truly a supernatural and miraculous event: the virgin birth, the angels appearing to the shepherds (who were considered the commoners), and the star that lasted for several months to lead the wise men to Christ. As well as the perfect symbolism of the gifts of the magi. The gold showing He is a king, myrrh representing that He is a healer and also symbolizing Christ’s death and resurrection, and frankincense is an aromatic oil that can be used to calm anxiety, which shows He is the Prince of Peace. These were all good reminders of why Jesus’ birth was so incredible.
Also, a big part of my dad’s sermon had to do with the fact that the Christian Christmas is in jeopardy. Even at a school in Tennessee there was a lawyer present to make sure the children could sing “O little Town of Bethlehem” w/o crossing any legal boundaries! Plus how it has suddenly become offensive to say “Christmas” and it has been reduced to “Happy Holidays.” He encouraged us to stand up for the Christ of Christmas and not be afraid to remind others of the reason we celebrate Christmas to begin with. I will never be ashamed to say “Merry Christmas” or to send the message of God’s love to my all of my co-workers this or any time of year (as I do every year in the form of a “religious” letter, no matter where I work)! And I really don’t care when He was born, b/c, in my opinion, it’s just semantics, and all that matters is that we choose to honor Christ’s birth and take full advantage of this time of year to share Christ’s love! And then continue that message throughout the year, and not forget all about witnessing on December 26!

I want a hippopotamus for Christmas!

You have to take the time to listen to this. It is the funniest song ever! My mom & I started a tradition about 8 years ago to try & find a hippo for each other for Christmas/Hannukah. I just found hers today. It's pretty funny to ask someone at the story if they have any hippos. They look at you like you just asked for a hippo! Anyway, here's the link: http://www.minibite.com/christmas/hippo.htm

What is your Identity?

There is a new game show called “Identity.” There are 12 people on the stage and the contestant has to pick from a list of identities and match it to the “strangers” (as they are referred) on stage. Some are really obvious such as a sumo wrestler who is dressed as such, or when the only one on stage wearing cowboy boots and hat is the champion bull rider. The others get more complicated as trying to guess which is the heart transplant recipient or the preacher’s kid.
Of course this got me to thinking, what if I was on that show? What would my identity be and would I be able to fool the contestant? Then of course (as my sister and dad know) there is a sermon in everything, so I saw the spiritual significance in this. When others look at me, can they see my most important identity: a child of Christ? Do I easily come across as a Christian by my words and actions? If not, I need to seriously work on my attitude and make sure that my light shines to all who try to guess my identity.

Thank you, Cheryl

I still don’t have the heart to want to write about Cosette’s death, and I don’t feel it’s something that needs to be documented here anyway. However, I would like to acknowledge my friend Cheryl’s involvement. I could not get a hold of my dad at any of his phone numbers and my mom had lost her key to her shed & wanted me to wait until tomorrow to bury Cosie. But when Cheryl called, and w/o me telling her anything was wrong she quickly heard it in my voice and asked what was wrong. When I told her Cosie had died and I didn’t even have a shovel to bury her, she did not hesitate and said she was on her way. Despite her major back trouble she even helped dig the grave.
I’m not trying to put down my parents: my dad later called and profusely apologized for not getting my messages, and my mom & Frank came to help Cheryl & I dig the grave. But Cheryl was the only one who was instantly there and did not hesitate to come over. Even though I thanked her, I don’t know if she realizes how much this act of kindness meant to me.
Once again, I am not trying to put anyone down for not being there when needed (I apprecaite what I got), just acknowledging Cheryl’s pure act of kindness and friendship. I will not forget it.

Here are Some More

Quentin (the gold cat) has such a sweet expression in that photo. His nickname is "Sweet Baboo," b/c he is such a loving boy. Kailee(the dog) looks sad in the photo, but so snuggly. And Oliver looks like a king surveying his kingdom. He looks quite beautiful. I wish I had a digital camera instead of just a photo disc so I could crop and zoom in. Both of the cat photos would look nice closer up.

New Photos

Here are some new photos. I wish I had the ones of Frodo & Jonah when I entered the dog photo contest. I don't want to go back & start over at this point. As you can see, I have a crowded bed at night. They don't usually all sleep there at once, but at least 2-3 dogs and at least 2-3 cats. I wouldn't have it any other way (except to have Cosette back, of course). The one of Jonah in the tunnel shows how silly he is. It's a cat tunnel that my cats like to play in. Jonah tries to play inside and doesn't quite fit, so he'll get in as far as he can and squeak his toys while inside. He's a goofball!

Random Ramblings

Trees lose their leaves and become ugly, but will eventually be beautiful again. So we must also go through an ugly phase in life to again be beautiful. Of course I am not referring to outer, but inner beauty.
Life is often a windy, rocky road that takes more effort to climb than we want to make. When we get to the other side we are dirty, exhausted, and frustrated. But if we look over our shoulder, we will be amazed at how far we came. The circumstances may not have changed even one iota, but our hearts and souls have changed. Maybe not for anyone else to see, but we know it, and more importantly, God knows it.
My brain is still in a fog since Cosette died, so I don’t really have much more to say, and I’m not really being clear to what I’m trying to convey all that’s in my heart, but here it is anyway.

Amazing Talent

Check out this girl's art work. It will leave you speechless.
http://www.artakiane.com/akiane_art.htm#

Some Photos of my SIS's family

Oops, they all came out sideways, and I don't know how to fix it. The family is: Christina, Russ, Kaitlyn (14), Jordan (12), Ian (11), Noah (9), & Hannah (6). My sisiter took those photos w/ her digital camera. Gorgeous family on the inside as well as the out!

Happy Birthday x2

Happy 57th birthday, mom!
Happy 11th birthday, Ian!
May God bless your special days!

My sister sent me a bunch of family photos with a photo disc, so I can add pics to my blog. That's my nephew Ian w/ their dog, Quimby. He's the above-mentioned b-day boy.

So, THANKS S.I.S. for the photos, disc, and the great gift of the photo calendar!

In Loving Memory of Cosette

Cosette succumbed to her illness Friday. I don’t have to heart to write about it, but just want to say that I promise to love you forever, Cosette, and miss you more than I can bear.
(If you noticed my tribute to Bart on Friday, they have the same date, December 8, as the day they died. Also, she is the 4th animal I have lost in 2 years.)

Those are the last 2 photos taken of her. You can see in her expression that she was not well (her eyes are so yellow due to her jaundice). I didn't take any photos during her worst stages of illness b/c I didn't want to capture her looking so awful (even though my mind will never forget).

Untitled (Last Poem)

Here’s the last poem. Once again, I haven’t done a lot of poetry writing from 2002 until now b/c of my time spent on my novel. In fact after this one, I don’t think I wrote any others until the three I posted on my blog in October.
This particular poem was written for a friend that gets depressed quite often. One day when I was praying for her, God gave me this poem. I have never written a poem so quickly or easily before or since. It’s also the only poem I chose not to title. I don’t know why.

Untitled 2005 (age 33)
Depression
Has settled in,
How can she
Tame such a Beast
That devours life’s joy?
With teeth and claws
That scratch and bite,
And a forked tongue
That whispers hate and deceit,
And purrs sweet nothings
To make her believe
Its treacherous lies

Redemption
Has paid the price
To kill the Beast
And set her free;
With nail-pierced hands
That comfort and heal,
And eyes of peace
Full of hope and love,
And words of truth
To bless with joy,
And a pure heart
Full of mercy and grace

In Memory of Bart

I lost Bart, a poodle-mix, 2 years ago on December 8, 2004. He was rescued from the animal shelter in 1990. He was originally supposed to be a wedding gift for my sister and her husband, but their apartment would not allow dogs (actually my bro-in-law, Russ is the one whoi named Bart after Bart Simpson). Their loss was my great gain. Bart was with me for 14 years (he was 17 when he died). He was sweet, funny, loving, smart, and a great friend. He loved to be everywhere I was. He had to sleep right next to my side while I slept. Unfortunately for him, I toss a lot in my sleep, but he turned every time I did. My cats all fell in love with Bart’s gentle nature as he became sort of a surrogate father to them. My cat Caspian snuggled with Bart almost as much as Bart snuggled with me. He searched for Bart for several weeks after his death and would walk around the house “crying” – meowing - for him. I will never stop missing Bart and cherish every day I had him in my life. I grieve the loss of him as anyone would grieve the loss of any family member. I believe it will always hurt to think of the day he died. I don’t feel like writing about it here, but it was a horrible day that will always haunt me. (Just looking at these photos got me choked up.)
I don’t theologically know for sure if animals go to Heaven. So, wherever you are, Bart, be at peace. (Sorry so many photos, but I couldn’t choose just 1.)

Bunch of photos (part 2)

Gidget & Bart (both deceased( were mine) & Julie is me! The rest of the cats are all mine. Caspian & Quentin were in the last set of photos, but these were revised as I added black to thier whiskers.

A Bunch of Photos (part 1)

Cookie & Cappy are my mom's dogs & Quimby is my sis's; Jaydee (deceased) & Kailee are mine.

Brandy (deceased) & Zoe are dad's dogs; Caspian & Quentin are mine and Yonni is my mom's.

Here are a bunch of photos of the ornaments I made in 2003 for all my animals & also the ones I made for family. I also made one for my then boss for her dog & one for Cheryl's dog, but I didn't take photos of them. I later made one of Frodo & MuLan when they came to live w/ me, and one for my mom's cat Simcha, but they are not in this set of photos. I ran out of ornaments to decorate by the time Bre & Jonah came, so they just have cheap foam ones that I put beads on.

Amara (deceased), Dimitri, & Belicia are mine.

Designed by God

Okay, here’s another huge gap. This time it’s 4 years. It was an okay time in my life. I was probably too busy and tired working all the crazy shifts at the police department. I did write a few poems during this time, but nothing spiritual, other than “Carole’s Song” in 2002 that I previously posted (on Oct. 23). Most of the poems were either crush-related (there were 3 during that time span) or just observations of life. Also, I think the reason I didn’t write so much from about 2002 until now is b/c I have been more involved in writing my novel in my spare time rather than writing poetry.


Designed by God 2003 (age 31)
People ask me
If it is hard to live alone,
But I have never been afraid
To spend time with myself;
Since I was a child,
I would spend hours in solitude,
Imagining and creating stories;
My mother tells me,
Entertaining myself,
Was a habit I acquired
At a very young age;
It is how I know this is whom I am meant to be;
For the book of Psalms
Tells me I was designed by God,
While still in my mother’s womb;
God planned the child, teenager, and woman
I would grow to be;
God knew I would be alone,
So he gave me a gift with animals,
A reverse of Adam, so to speak - -
He made them for my companionship.
So yes, I know God created the path I will travel;
I was meant to remain unmarried,
To be content sharing my home
With only animal companions.
And I am satisfied with my life as is,
Because it is what God chose for me.

The Journey of my Life & Isaiah 40:31

Here is another gap in my poetry. This time I did write quite a bit of poetry in 1998. I wrote at least 14 poems in less than 2 years for a man I was seriously infatuated with. If ever I have been in love, it was with him. But I digress as I am not writing of him, I am explaining another gap. This is not to say my spirituality lacked during this time, in fact it was a time of my life where God taught me a lot about feeling compassion for those I was having difficultly with, but my creative energy was wrapped up more in him than in HIM.

The Journey of my Life 1999 (age 27)
My journey began some time ago,
And I seem to have been on it for a lifetime;
The road at times goes in circles,
Or goes no where at all,
But I plod along,
Trying to end up somewhere…
Anywhere that’s not here;
Sometimes I stand still,
Not able to move –
Either by way of weakness or stubbornness,
But not wanting to continue;
But I know I must,
I know something better waits for me,
There must be more than merely existing,
To feel breath in my lungs not accompanied by a sigh,
To not think of heaven as merely an escape from earth,
To believe God when He says He has plans for my life;
But that is the point,
I think,
Of this journey –
If I can continue to live life as it exists now,
But with the knowledge that it’s not over,
And with the hope that something better could be in my next step,
Then this journey has meaning,
And, therefore, so does life

Isaiah 40:31 1999 (age 27)
“But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength…”

I have become quite good at waiting,
Waiting to look my age,
Waiting for a job to make me happy,
Waiting to be married and have children;
My strength is only renewed
When I remember that God is in control of my future,
Only His guidance will pull me through

“They shall mount up with wings as eagles…”

I haven’t yet learned to fly,
But my wings grow stronger every day
As my faith grows,
And I fully begin to accept
That God is in control,
Only then do I feel the wind beneath me
As I soar on the mercy of Christ.

“They shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint.”

It is hard not to grow weary of this world,
Of the selfishness,
Of the violence,
Of the hate,
But I have found myself enduring,
Wrapped in the security of Christ,
And His everlasting love

To tree or not to tree?

Okay, corny title. But Christmas trees seem to be a controversial issue to Christians lately. Are they pagan or not? Well, I am one for researching the heck out of anything I am curious about. I like to read several articles from several sources rather than believe just one. Call me skeptical, but I tend to think this as practical (b/c I don’t automatically believe everything I’m told)! Anyway, I actually did my research about 3 months ago knowing Christmas was not that far off. Here is what I found: Yes, pagans used to worship trees as part of their “winter solstice” celebration. They even murdered people under these trees to appease their gods. But here’s the thing, it was oak trees, and it had nothing to do with Christmas. The actual Christmas tree for Christmas’ sake is a tradition begun in Europe during the middle ages. The decorations were apples, wafers, pastries, and other symbols used to represent the Eucharist. A German monk in the seventh century chose the triangular shape of the tree to symbolize the trinity, and referred to it as “God’s tree.” After this is was brought to America where fruits, nuts, candy, and flowers were added, and eventually blown glass. Brining trees indoors and lights were added by Martin Luther to symbolize the light of Christ (I don’t actually like Martin Luther due to the fact he was a very hateful anti-Semite, but this is not my point today). So the pagan Winter Solstice tree was for a different purpose than the Christmas tree.
Another reason fir trees are used: there is a story that says that while Mary, Joseph, and baby Jesus were fleeing Herod, they stooped by a fir tree to hide and rest. Supposedly baby Jesus then blessed the tree. They say if you cut open a pine cone lengthwise, that you can still see what looks like a hand print. Also: when Saint Boniface saw pagans worshiping an OAK tree, he became angry & cut it down. A FIR tree grew in its place. The “saint” told the pagans that this tree was a tree of Christ and that it symbolized His promise to the world of eternal life.
As long as your tree is not your idol then I don’t believe God would be offended by it. I have many warm childhood memories with my family decorating our tree. My sister and I used to get to open an early gift of an ornament when we put up the tree. It was a bonding family moment, which I believe God was pleased with. I love the warm and cozy glow Christmas lights bring to a darkened room; it still feels a little “magical.”
(The photo was taken in 2004. I’m not putting a tree up this year due to my crazy dogs I know would knock it over.)

John 1:5

You may notice the 2-year gap between this and my last poem. I went an entire year, 1995, w/o writing a single poem, and only wrote 4 in 1996. This was during a rough time in my life. I didn’t do much of any kind of writing (including any novels). Often a broken heart makes for some great and profound writing, but my heart was too angry and bitter to produce much at that time. Thank God I made it through to the other side.

John 1:5 1997 (age 25)
The darkness may not understand the Light,
But the Light desires to break through,
Piercing the heart of mockery;
Even if just a crack of Light makes way,
Perhaps a change will occur,
Or perhaps the confusion of the Light in the dark
Will make the blackness much colder,
And the Light will be forced out even more so,
For not understanding why the Light strives to overcome the dark
Brings about a misdirected anger,
Grasping to understand, but remaining confused;
Not understanding the war within,
Struggling to break free from the suffocating darkness,
But not yet willing;
For if the dark has never experienced a cleansing heat,
The intrusion it feels wants to annihilate the Light,
And never again be forced to look at things through bright eyes;
But the Light will come again,
For it will forever exist,
And it will not cease to attempt to penetrate the dark,
For the Light never loses strength, and sends fear into the dark’s soul,
So that the dark will never forget that the Light was there,
And the memory of the warmth will remain

“And the Light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it.” – John 1:5

Want to go crazy?

Want to drive yourself insane? Try this game. My highest score so far is: 1,140.
http://www.hurtwood.demon.co.uk/Fun/copter.swf

Philippians 4:13 & Worthy

Philippians 4:13 1994 (age 22)
God, help me,
I can barely find the strength to breathe,
There is so much weighing on my soul,
And I fear this time it’s there to stay;
Give me strength, sweet Jesus,
I cannot do this without You;
I feel like I will fall if You let go,
Please hold me tighter,
I need You!
Don’t let me give up, Lord,
It would be so easy;
Don’t let me cease to believe in You,
For I feel my doubts are stronger than I am,
They are pulling me so hard,
I feel I am drowning!
O, Heavenly Father, save me,
Don’t let me lose sight of Your love,
Pull me up from despair;
Don’t let me give into disbelief;
Make me trust in You more;
I know I have pushed You away,
But I’ve always known I’ve needed You;
Let me come to You, dear Savior,
I feel I can no longer burden You,
But I need You once again;
I hope I will never stop needing You,
For without You I am weak,
But through Your strength,
I can do all things!

“I can do everything through Him who gives me strength.” – Philippians 4:13

Worthy 1994 (age 22)
I wasn’t worldly enough for Ami,
I didn’t drink, smoke, or dance;
Though once best friends,
We are now strangers in far away worlds

I wasn’t beautiful enough for RQ,
I yearned for him,
But I wasn’t important to him,
And my lips will never know the feel of his

I wasn’t dependent enough upon my mother,
I didn’t cling to her apron strings,
So my existence was ignored,
And my feelings were trampled

I wasn’t decisive enough for my father,
I couldn’t choose my future fast enough,
So he left me behind,
And cried bitterly when we parted

I wasn’t sinful enough for Jesus Christ,
I was too broken and afraid;
He only held me tighter,
And promised that I’d always be worthy in His sight

Too much interpretation? (Do not read unless you are prepared for an honest – and long - ranting session that is sure to offend some.)

Just how much interpretation of the bible is too much? I think thorough study of the bible is imperative to a Christian’s walk, but I also believe some people get carried away. When words that aren’t actually written are being interpreted as “reading between the lines” I think this gets dangerous. Deuteronomy 4:2 says, “Do not add to what I command you and do not subtract from it, but keep the commands of the Lord your God.”
I’ve been around a lot of people who add meaning to the scripture that’s not there and then, instead of simply stating that they are merely theorizing (which is okay) they now proclaim this to be truth! It especially gets dangerous when someone says, “God told me so.” Then why isn’t God revealing the same thing to everyone? Are you saying you are more important than everyone else who reads their bible? Why not be honest and say it’s an idea you had instead of bordering on being offensive by putting words in the Creator of the Universe’s mouth? Not that God doesn’t reveal special and private things to some, but just be careful what you say came from God and not just came from your gut! Don’t twist your fleshly ideas to make God conform to you. And don’t forget that Stan is the Father of Lies and loves to confuse Christians.
In case anyone is wondering what has prompted my soap box issue, it’s b/c I was reading a friend of a friend’s blog, and she was insisting that the bible commands women are to stay home whether they have children or not, and that women can only be called to the ministry if their husband is called! I was not going to be disrespectful and argue w/ a teenager (who is a stranger to me), but this made me very angry and very sad! In essence, she is saying that I am unbiblical b/c I’m not staying home to tend to my house, even though I have to work since I am single. And so are other women who either have to or choose to work outside the home. Also, who is anyone to say God doesn’t call women to be single or to the ministry? I pity her for thinking that women are inferior to men. No one can truly be happy if they believe themselves inferior to anyone. Besides God calls each person on an individual basis. My sister is blessed to be called to be home w/ her children. I, however, have been called to be single so I can be there to comfort the lonely people in my life. Does that mean that God loves me any less b/c he has not called me to motherhood? Or is angry w/ me b/c I don’t stay home? And why must women be 1 thing or the other. Every human is multi-facted and can be many things at once.
This brings me back to the whole “command” issue. The bible was inspired by God, yes, but was written by human hands, and therefore, is based on human suggestions. We know their words are based on Godly morality issues so that we might live a pure life pleasing to God based on the actual commands God gave to Moses. Unless the bible specificially uses the words “command,” most words are a human’s thoughts and opinions. Or if God or Jesus were actually speaking and the words are quotes from the Almighty’s lips. When Paul sates in 1 Corinthians 7 that it is good for a man not to marry, he is merely expressing his thoughts, not saying God is making this a command. Paul was always very clear in stating “I, not the Lord,” am saying… or “The Lord, not I." He is not saying marriage is wrong any more than the thought in 1 Corinthians 11:15 that says long hair is a woman’s glory means that women are commanded to not cut their hair. I could go on and on.
It makes me sad that people can’t just read the bible and enjoy the fullness as written rather than tear it apart word by word. (And, yes, I believe “as written” means in the original Hebrew for the actual translation, but I don’t believe a different version destroys the message.) It wasn’t meant to be cryptic so that only the scholars could understand the “true” meaning. The bible says God is no respecter of persons, which mean the bible was meant for us all to read and understand, and that no man is better than any other man or woman! And, yes, it’s just my OPINON, and I would not be so arrogant to state my thoughts as facts! (Not that I think that little girl was being arrogant, I just wish she didn’t see her views as fact. It makes me think she must think that God does not love women as much as He loves men and it makes me sad.)
I think the whole purpose of the bible was to encourage us as well as being a guide to what is right and wrong. As long as we are doers and not just hearers of the word, and live a pure and holy life, I think that is much more important than trying to tear apart every word in the bible to create new meaning from it. As the bible says, it is important to study God’s words, but the wisest man ever to live states in Ecclesiastes 12:12-13, “Be warned, my son, of anything in addition to them. Of making many books there is no end, and much study wearies the body. Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man.” That verse perfectly wraps up everything I am trying to say.
If I offend any, it was not my intention, but this is my blog to voice my views and I will always do so. Feel free to disagree or agree in the comment section, fort I believe in respecting others’ opinions and ideas, even when I don’t agree.

Because of Men

Because of Men 1994 (age 22)
Because of men,
Women go weak in the knees,
They write enough poetry to fit into a book,
They cry and feel pain,
And make fools of themselves

Because of men,
Women settle down to marry,
They learn to cook and clean,
They become mothers
And begin a happy home

Because of men,
Women get divorced,
They want everything to belong to them;
They yell and scream,
They learn to hate

Because of mankind,
Jesus dies upon a cross,
He wrote them a love story as long as a book,
He cried and felt pain,
He let them make Him look like a fool

Because of mankind,
Christ rose from the dead,
He returned to heaven,
He prepared a place for them,
He offers a happy home

Because of mankind,
People turn away from God,
They forget His love,
And remember only their cruelties

True Happiness & Judgment Day & The Voice

True Happiness 1994 (age 22)
I have discovered happiness is surreal;
There is no real joy in this world,
Pain lurks around every corner,
Ready to drag another victim down

If only I look past worldly boundaries,
I can see a brighter Light,
A Light that dims the sun,
And where there is never any darkness

I reach for that Light,
Though I am uncertain what it brings,
For I know it is Jesus Christ,
And His peace is all I need to know

If only I will let Him lead me,
And use only desires He gives to me,
Then His happiness will bring comfort,
And this world’s pleasures won’t mean a thing

Judgment Day 1994 (age 22)
When all is said and done,
And I stand before my Lord,
He will not ask me of my wealth,
Nor will He ask about my successes,
He does not care whether I wore the proper fashion,
For this world will fade away;
What my God really wants to know
Is if I truly loved Him with all my heart;
Did I desire His perfect will for my life
And seek His guidance with fervent prayer?
Am I practicing all I read in His holy word,
Or am I a hearer only?
Am I a quiet witness,
Do I shout His name in the streets,
Or do I pretend He means nothing to me?
When I meet my Jesus face to face,
And bow in fear and reverence,
I want Him to know that He is everything to me,
And that I tried to be everything for Him

The Voice 1994 (age 22)
So many frustrations in my life,
So many hardships to bear,
Yet a peace encloses my heart,
And a Voice gently tells me not to fear

My senses come alive as the Voice speaks;
I have heard that sound before;
The soothing Voice calms my anxieties;
It is my dearest friend, my Lord!

A Quick Note to my SIS

S.I.S, Hey just wondering what your family wants for Christmas? Is there a specific game (electronic or board) that you all want? Or would you prefer cash or a gift certificate? Or something else? THANKS!

Mercy & My Prayer

Mercy 1993 (age 21)
I sit alone to talk to You,
But words are so hard to come by;
I want to speak of my love for You,
But You are so hard to comprehend;
You surrendered Your dignity to be nailed to a tree
For all the world to see;
How can I put such an act into words?

In all Your majesty and glory, Lord,
You allow me to come,
Alone I will be with You,
To bask in Your mercy

When I failed You and broke Your heart,
You still loved and cherished me, Lord,
And never gave up on me;
Compassion saw past my stubborn heart
And allowed me to come back into Your arms,
To lean on Your love alone,
Knowing Your mercy will always find me

No matter how hard life may be,
Your love brings things into perspective;
Your grace makes life bearable,
And my trust remains in You

(Note: I actaully put music to the "Mercy"poem at one time. That is definitely not one of my talents!)

My Prayer 1993 (age 21)
Dear Lord,
Anger rose within me today…
How could one more bad thing happen?
How could I possibly handle more?
I am not so strong, Lord;
But as I opened up Your Word,
A wave of Your comfort swept over me;
You knew how much I needed Your love,
Your compassionate voice told me all I needed was You;
You also gently reminded me of my words:
I asked You to test me, Lord,
I begged for You to make me stronger,
Make me ready to serve You,
Whatever it takes, Lord;
I am willing to be used by and for You;
And as I grow emotionally bound to You,
And the tears I used to hate surge,
I am comforted by those tears,
For you are the One who caused them to be,
And through them, I am stronger;
For I feel You most when I am weak,
And even while I’m telling You my day’s woes,
You empower me in Your love…
I love You, Lord;
Thank, you for trusting me enough to test me.
I will do my best for You;
Amen!

“Test me, O Lord, and try me, examine my heart and my mind, for Your love is ever before me, and I walk continually in Your Truth.” – Psalm 26:12-13